When I Win the Lottery

While I'm posting lyrics, here's my favorite song by Camper van Beethoven. It's somewhat offensive, but in a kind of lovable way:

Well I lost an eye in Mexico
Lost two teeth where I don't know
People see me comin' and they move to the other side of the road.

I robbed a liquor store or two
Made myself at home a few times
Borrowed myself a car when I needed it.

I got me a shack at the bottom of the road
Fixin' cars and givin' tows
Spend all my money on the lottery.

When I win the lottery gonna buy all girls on my block
A color TV and a bottle of French perfume
When I win the lottery gonna donate half my money to the city
So they have to name a street or a school or a park after me
When I win the lottery

Never run a flag up a pole
Like Mr. Red, White, and Blue down the road
But I never called myself a hero for killing a known communist.

Now I can walk into any old bar
Find a fight without looking too hard
But I never killed someone I don't know just 'cause someone told me to.

And when I win the lottery
Gonna buy the house next to Mr. Red, White and Blue
And when I win the lottery
Gonna buy Post 306 American Legion, paint it red with five gold stars.
When I win the lottery.

When the end comes to this old world
The righteous will cry and the rest will curl up
And God won't take the time to sort your ashes from mine.

'Cause we zig and zag between good and bad
Stumble and fall on right and wrong
'Cause the tumbling dice and the luck of the draw just leads us on.

And when I win the lottery, gonna buy all the girls on my block
Silver-plated six shooters and a quart of the finest highland scotch
'Cause when I win the lottery, the righteous will shake their heads and say that
God is good but surely works in mysterious ways.
When I win the lottery.

Comments

When I win the Lottery

I'm not sure there's enough money to do all the things I would want to do.....

But, I would start with some afterschool programs for low income kids/families...I'm boring that way.

My favorite part of this song (which I've never heard btw...)

When the end comes to this old world
The righteous will cry and the rest will curl up
And God won't take time to sort your ashes from mine

I'll have to find this one and listen to it. I'm stuck back in the 60s with the Doors and Credence.



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Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

Hmmm...

What would I do if I won the lottery and was in a spiteful, selfish mood...? I might buy Lowes Motor Speedway and turn it into a flea-market/crafts fair. Or maybe I would buy Fox News, pay all the anchors double their salaries to keep them on, and then have them read copy written by the BlueNC regulars all day long. And finish each segment with "I am a big stinky poop head."